Coming Clean

I have been blowing my diet for weeks, and I don't seem to be able to stop myself. I
spent a long time tonight asking God to help me, and I feel much calmer about it now.
So I am going to fast for a couple of days, because that helps me get things in the right perspective and begin my food program all over again on Sat. morning.

God is so much better able to handle all of the things that I am worried about than I am, including my food issues. Don and I went away for the weekend, and we had so much fun. Sunday we went to church in Hendersonville, NC, and we enjoyed the worship service, but I missed my boys. After that we went to the North Carolina Arboretum and walked for several miles. Also, before church I worked out in the hotel pool. But I ate badly all day....and all day Monday...and all day Tuesday....and all day today. It's like I'm blowing my diet just to blow it. So I'm mad at myself, and that's not a good thing either. I'm being honest, because
this is a vicious cycle that can go on for months if I let it. And I made a committment to lose 100 lbs. this year. I can still do it....God and I can still do it...if I don't waste anymore time. Pray for me, if you're reading this. I'm feeling despair over the fact that I'm losing my focus.

On the positive side, I've been doing a great job with my house, Conner, and I've been writing and painting. I'm writing devotionals and Bible studies while I'm working on a big project. I'm really trying to write for a living, and I'm learning great things through all of the resources I got at the Christian Writer's conference.

Little Man has a cold, and we aren't liking that! He's not been sick yet. I spent a lot of the morning suctioning out his nose. I forgot how much babies hate that. He kept batting my hand away and giving me his scrunchy face. He's still moving all over the place and playing with his toys, his feet, his hands and my face! :) So I guess he's not too sick.

Pray for my brother, who has been sick, my neighbor Barbara, who has an impossible situation, and my son Nathan, who is working on some hard issues in his life...he is doing well, though. I'll let you know how the fasting and the new committment goes. Feel free to ask.